029 - Rinoa - Video

[livelyangel.livejournal.com]

[Rinoa is back in her room in Garden. She's curled up on the bed, hugging her dog, Angelo. The pair are inseparable. Rinoa can't look at anyone else without the memories of everything she did getting in the way. But Angelo loves her. Even though she locked Angelo up and left her, a dog's love is unconditional and Rinoa is clinging to that right now.

She looks at the camera for several long moments. She knows that she has to apologise to everyone, but what can she say?]

...I'm sorry.

[And that's all Rinoa can manage for now. She leans forward and the feed switches off.]

Comments

[video]

[shurikenfemale.livejournal.com]

[Of course Cissnei is concerned, after all, she was something like her partner in this mystery that was the Chalice. She had heard of what happened, how all of the mess wasn't really her fault at all, and she feels so sorry for her.]

Rinoa...

[Cissnei is having trouble trying to figure out what to say. What do you even say to that? She tries to remain as calm as possible to not make her more distraught than what she already was.]

How are you feeling right now?

[video]

[livelyangel.livejournal.com]

[Rinoa stares. She remembers this woman. She's struggling to remember her name though; after all the bad stuff that happened, the thing about the chalices seemed unimportant.

And then there's the question. Rinoa laughs bitterly at that. And when the words 'Rinoa' and 'bitterly' are in the same sentence, you know something is wrong.]

Bad. Guilty. Sick.

[video]

[shurikenfemale.livejournal.com]

[She realizes after her response how truly stupid of a question that was. Good job, Cissnei. Kick ass? Check. Take names? Check. Make people feel better? Not exactly.]

I... I know you're hurting, really, I know the feeling of guilt but...

[She pauses. Did she really have any kind words for Rinoa? She couldn't think of anything without making her feel worse. Hell even she had trouble coming to terms with the future Reno painted for her, how changing her present could potentially ruin everything.]

Maybe forgiving yourself is the first step before asking for forgiveness?

[video]

[livelyangel.livejournal.com]

[There's a long pause while she thinks about it.]

I don't think I could do one without the other.

[video]

[shurikenfemale.livejournal.com]

You have to start somewhere, you know. It'll come full circle when you're ready to forgive yourself, just take your time.

[As she told Rufus earlier...]

What's done is done. It might be good to move on.

[In which she realizes that it was time for her to move on, too, and accept the coming changes.]

[video]

[livelyangel.livejournal.com]

That easy, huh? Have you ever tortured your own friends? Or betrayed them?

[video]

[shurikenfemale.livejournal.com]

Tortured, no. Betrayed?

[She stays silent for a good 30 seconds.]

Maybe. In a time beyond mine, I might have. But I might have the option or the will to face myself but I won't know until I get there.

You don't seem like you'd be the kind of person to do either out of spite. Moving on is difficult, yeah, but it takes time to heal. Old wounds stay fresh if you think too long or hard.

[video]

[livelyangel.livejournal.com]

[She shrugs unhappily, not meeting Cissnei's eyes.]

Yeah.